Tuesday, March 29, 2011

4. I know who I want to take me home

The night of February 22 when it all began……

Closing Time – Semisonic

So gather up your jackets, move it to the exits
I hope you have found a friend
Closing time
Every new beginning comes from some other
beginning's end

I know who I want to take me home
Take me home

After the game, everyone was stoked over the win. We had only played the Islanders but we needed the 2 points. The next morning we had an early practice, and then had to fly out to Montreal for a game there. We had planned to go out, but with the threat of the early morning skate ahead of us, everyone bailed on me.

I know I’m new in this city, but after a win you celebrate. So I decided to go for a beer before heading home. I walked into the packed pub and made an “A” line for the bar to order myself a beer. That’s when I saw her. She was with a friend, this really short girl; Boyce would like her I think. They were laughing and joking, sitting at a four top table, away from the bar.

I called the bartender over “See that girl over there? I’ll pay for her drinks for the rest of the night. Whatever she wants, it’s hers.”

“Which one? There’s a lot of broads in here tonight!”

“The one with the blondish-brown hair and the scarf with the short brunette, over there” I nod my head in the direction of her table and hopefully at her.

“Oh, the ice queen, she drives a hard bargain that one, you’re the third guy who’s tried to by them drinks tonight, she just keeps shuttin’ ‘em down and sendin’ ‘em back”

“I’m not sending any over to her, just let her order, give her her drink, and walk away.” I hand him a fifty.

“No problem. You want me to tell her you’re buying?”

“Nope, I’ll do that myself” I say as I hand him my credit card to start our tab.

I ran outside and called the only person who I really know in this city, Clark, and begged him to meet me. I know he has a girlfriend and I’m not trying to fuck with that. He’s a decent guy and a good friend and agreed to meet me to be my fake wingman for the night. What can I say, guys work better in packs.

I resumed my spot sitting at the bar. I had the perfect view of her from here, well a side view anyway, but it was clear of obstruction. I watched in amusement as she approached the bar and gestured to the bartender that she needed 2 more of whatever her and her friend were drinking. He mixed the colourful liquid, and then strained it into 2 large martini glasses. He placed the drinks in front of her, nodded his head, then turned on his heel and left her there. He walked over to my end of the bar, making eye contact with me before busying himself tending to the next patron.

She tries to get his attention by waving her arm. When that didn’t work, she stepped up onto the foot rail to give herself added height then leaned over the bar to get his attention. As she moved her body forward, her shirt pulls down in the front and exposes a fantastic view of her long neck and ample cleavage. ‘Holy Shit’ I could feel my pants getting a little snug. “Excuse me sir, I didn’t pay you!” she says. I could barely hear her over the music but I could read the words on her lips.

After a few attempts she reaches further over and places a twenty on the bartender’s side of the bar. I couldn’t believe this girl, who doesn’t just walk away when a bartender ‘forgets’ to charge you for a drink? I watch her hop down from the foot rail making her breasts jiggle. She grabs her drinks and begins her sexy little walk back over to her table. The way her hips sway when she walks is mesmerizing. It’s not exaggerated like most chicks in bars looking to pick up. No, hers is completely natural and sexy as hell; I take a long haul from my beer to cool down a bit. Where the hell is Clarke? The bartender looks at me and shrugs his shoulders. I motion for him to bring me her cash.

I finished my beer while watching them talking and laughing. She seems cheerful but a little reserved for the first bit, but then I guess the alcohol started to kick in, and she starts to get really quite animated when she speaks. Moving her hands, making gestures, this was hilarious to watch. I don’t know what she was talking about, but at one point she grabbed her throat, crossed her eyes and flopped back in her chair pretending to drop dead. That earned her a slap on the arm from her friend then they both started cracking up laughing.

I couldn’t help myself, she was so damn cute and I chuckled out load at the amusing site. “What’s so funny?” Clarke asks me as he slaps his hand down patting me in the back. I gesture to her with the neck of my bottle and he smiles. “Already zeroing in on the kill are we?” He laughs while I order us a round. “So, why is it exactly that you need me to be here, if you already found what you’re looking for tonight? It’s not like you need the help selecting, if their breathing it’s on with you eh?”

“Fuck off” I’m not going to admit to him that I find myself a little insecure living in this new city by myself. Or that my ego took a hit with the trade, it was something I took really personally this time, it would be hard not to. I tell Clarke that I need him to distract the friend so I won’t look like such a horned up guy hitting on her.

Let’s be realistic though, I left Anaheim 2 weeks ago and I need to get laid. With the stress of the trade, the criticism of whether I’m worth it or not, moving and the pressure from playing here, I need some release. In California, it’s a nightly occurrence. The girls are just easy and willing to please.

I fill Clarke in on the plan and my agreement with the bartender. We watch as her friend comes over to pick up the next round, she orders and does a quick scan of the people lined along the bar including us. Her drinks are brought over but she doesn’t bat an eyelash when the bartender leaves her there, drinks in hand. Instead she laughs smiles to herself then turns and walks away. ‘She knows what’s going on’

About 20 minutes later my girl comes over for another round. She gets her drinks, goes to pay and of course the same thing ensues. I let her get back to her table and get settled for a few minutes before I decide to make my move. I send Clarke over. It’s just like in junior, he goes to break the ice, wins them over, then I come in for the kill. I chug down the rest of my beer for some extra liquid courage.

I watch as Clarke approaches their table. He’s a natural; chatty and jovial. Women don’t find him threatening only charming. He chats to them both at first but starts to focus on “Short stuff” and I watch her ask him to join them. I see him gesture in my direction indicating that he’s not alone and she nods. That’s my cue and I grab the 2 beers I preordered so it looks like I was getting us another round.

When I make it to the table I make eye contact with her immediately. I catch as her eyes go wide for a fraction of a second, then the look is gone and a shy smile appears on her lips. I set our beers down on the table. Clarke makes the introductions.

“Ladies, this is my friend Joffrey, Joffrey this is Jenn” he says and the short one offers me her hand to shake. “Nice to meet you” I say as we shake hands and I give her my best smile.

Clarke then turns my attention towards my target, I make eye contact with her and hold it. “And this is Michele” I can’t help the smile that’s plastered on my face ear to ear. “Michele, nice to meet you” I reach over to take her offered hand and shake it. It’s so soft and warm that I don’t want to let it go. Out of the corner of my eye I catch Jenn give Michele a devilish grin. I wonder what that’s about.

Clarke and Jenn start chatting away so I decide to take advantage of the opening.

“Do you come here often?” I ask in a lame attempt to make small talk, though I realize the minute I say it, it sounds like a cheesy pick up line.

“Never actually, this is my first time here. You?”

“First time for me too. I just moved here so I’m slowly starting to explore” I inform her.

“Oh, really? Where from?”


“Well that’s quite the change. Why would you come here to the freezing cold and snow, when you could be in the sunshine and heat all day?” She looks at me with a surprised look on her face.

“I didn’t really have a choice, I came here for work” I smile at her.

She nods her head in understanding. “If you don’t mind me asking what do you do for work that would require you moving here?” She asks matching my smile.

“Well it didn’t require I move here specifically, I was traded here, I play hockey professionally”

“Hockey? Like for the Marlies or the Leafs or something like that?”

“Yup, the Leafs”

“Wow, that’s an interesting career. I’m a hockey fan actually, I’m sorry to say, but I don’t really follow the Leafs too closely.” She says apologetically.

“Well I guess we’re going to have to change that”

“Maybe. I guess I’ll have to keep a closer eye on them now.” She shoots me a flirtatious grin. “How do you like it here so far?”

“It was hard to adjust at first, but it seems to keep getting better every day” I smile and wink at her.

We fall into conversation and it flows easily. Michele is very easy going and witty with a sarcastic sense of humor, which I like. We talk about what she does for a living, what we like to do outside of work, hobbies, T.V show, anything and everything and I feel like I’ve known her forever.

I notice the girls need refills and my beer is running low. “I’m gonna grab another round, I know Clarke needs a beer, but does anyone else want anything?”

Jenn pipes up. “Sure we’ll each have 2 more martinis. Michele, why don’t you go with Joffrey to get the drinks, he can’t bring back 4 drinks all by himself, with only 2 hands.” Jenn flashes Michele a huge grin. “Can do” she answers cheerfully.

We get to the bar and I signal to the bartender that we need 2 more for me and 2 more for her. “I got it” she says pulling cash out of the front pocket of her jeans.

“It’s already taken care of, I have a tab”

“Thank you” she says lightly touching my arm while looking up at me. The soft heat from her hand is setting my body on fire. I make eye contact with her. For the first time I notice that her eyes are the most amazing shade of blue.

“You’re welcome” We stand there looking at each other for what seems like forever. I need to say something before I kiss her. “We really should get back to those two” I tell her reluctantly.

“Yes, we should” She smiles.

We’re on our way back over in time to catch Jenn dragging Clarke to go dance to ACDC’s ‘You shook me all night long’.

“Do you want to join them?” I ask offering her my hand. “Yes please.” she exclaims happily. I’m not a big dancer but sometimes you just have to suck it up.

I guide her to where our friends are flailing around on the small dance floor. She starts twirling herself with my hand and singing at the top of her lungs. I couldn’t help but smile and sing along. When that song ends, we dance to a few more before a slow song came on. I pull her against me and we start swaying slowly. As the song went on we kept getting closer until there was absolutely no space between us and we were moving as one.

I was trying to not think of how close we were, I didn’t need to embarrass myself now, things were going really well. My hands were low on her back. My fingers sneaking under the hem of her shirt, tracing little circles on the small of her back. She looked me in the eyes then her eyes flickered to my lips and back up again. Her arms were draped around my shoulders pulling me closer and she started twirling the little hair I have between her fingers as we moved. She smiled up at me again then pulled her bottom lip between her teeth. I couldn’t resist any longer, I bent my head down and lightly brushed my lips against her mouth. Her lips were soft and she responded immediately deepening the kiss and pressing her soft body even tighter into mine. Her firm breasts felt amazing pressed up against me, moving gently across my chest with movement of our bodies. I brush my hand over her cheek and slide my tongue along her lips begging for entrance, she met my tongue with hers and we playfully dueled until she started to pull away. I grabbed her bottom lip between my teeth and let it slide out suggestively. Our eyes locked and bend my head down and kissed her cheek, I leaned in further and whispered in her ear “Do you want to get out of here?”

“Yes” she answered breathlessly as she nodded her head.

We quickly said our goodbyes, grabbed our coats and scarves and ran out front to hail a cab.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

3. Howlin' for you

Howlin’ for You- The Black Keys

I must admit
I can't explain
All these thoughts racing
Through my brain
It's true
Baby I'm howlin' for you

Can't you see
The little girl's
Got a hold on me
Like glue
Baby I'm howlin' for you

“Good bye, Beautiful”

“Good bye”

I opened the door to let her out of my apartment. I stood in the doorway with my arms crossed in front of me, watching her walk gingerly to the elevator and press the button. I’m surprised she can even walk this morning.

I guess she could feel me staring because she turned her body slightly and looked right at me. God she’s beautiful. I smiled and gave a little wave. She blushes slightly and tucks a piece of hair behind her ear and smiles back at me. Just then the elevator dings and surprised her, her head shot forward as the doors opened. I watched her chest rise as she closed her eyes, took a deep breath and looked back at me. She gave a wave and a cute little grin then stepped into the elevator. “Bye” I whispered, though I knew she couldn’t hear me.

I stepped back through the door, shut it and slid the lock in place. I’ve fucked a lot of girls in my day, when I say a lot I mean a lot. I couldn’t care less who they were or where they were from. When I was out trolling, with or without the boys and wanted to get laid, that was all that mattered. I know I sound like a I’m a dick, and I was when I was young. I like to think I’m getting better with age. I still have one night stands I’m not going to lie, but I’m a little more choosy about who I bring home, and it’s definitely not as frequently. With her, I can’t believe I convinced her to come home with me.

I look around. What a mess. I’ll deal with it when I get home from practice. I look over at the clock, it’s only 6 am and I don’t have to leave for practice until 8:40am. Plenty of time to grab a quick nap.

I crawl back into bed and sigh, the sheets smell of her perfume. I scrunch the pillow under my head and fall asleep in seconds. At 8:10 my alarm goes off and I drag myself out of bed and away from her scent. I take a quick shower before throwing on some sweats, a t-shirt and hoodie. I grab a quick breakfast of fruit and I’m locking my door at 8:40am.

I arrive at the ACC shortly before 9 am. Practice doesn’t officially start until 9:30 today so I have some time to shoot the shit with the guys. I then head into the dressing room to get ready. Clarke is already getting changed.

I take my place next to him and start to undress. Clarke is a good friend of mine. I’ve known him my whole life practically. We played on the same team in Alberta as kids and I like that I have someone from home who knows me.

“Loops, how was your night bud?” He says with a sly smile on his face but thankfully only loud enough for me to hear. I shrug my shoulders but couldn’t contain the smile that plastered my face.

“You looked pretty comfortable there last night.”

“I was.” I look up at him while I put my socks on.

“I’m sure”

I couldn’t hold it in anymore. “We have a lot in common and I actually wanted to talk to her. She was awesome, so easy to talk to.”

“And fucking hot” He adds to my statement. I look at him with a raised eyebrow.”What she is fucking hot and you know it, you dick”

“Yes, that she is…..and the sex was amazing” I can’t help but throw in that little piece of information out there. I pull my shirt over my head, grab my Under Armour shirt and turn to sit down.

“HOLY FUCK! Apparently she enjoyed herself too!”


“Your back, you have little red scratches all over and the bite mark on your shoulder……… Jesus Christ”

I had noticed my shoulder when I showered this morning, but not the scratches. They must be small. I don’t remember her clawing me to death like some cat, but I do remember her running her nails gently over my skin, the sensation was unbelievable.

“What can I say when your good your good, I’ll give you some pointers later on if you want.” I joke as I pull my shirt over my head.

“I don’t need any help from you” he chides back.

We get out on the ice and its hard work as usual. Coach Wilson is a slave driver and works us longer than the usual 45 minutes to an hour. Instead we’re treated to a full 90 minute skills competition until we’re tired and sore. Finally, he blows the whistle at 11am signaling our torture is over. Practice is especially grueling for me. I’m tired and my muscles are sore from my previous workout.

We leave the ice and I take my equipment off as soon as I’m in the dressing room. That’s when I hear it. I’d expected it earlier actually, but I suppose I was one of the first to change this morning so only Clarke got in his jabs. It starts up when I take off my Under Armour and wrap my towel around my waist.

“Loops looks like he’s making a name for himself here” Bozie makes the first remark to draw attention to me. The locker room erupts in hooting and hollering. “Didn’t take long. She was a wild one huh?” Kessel chides. Everyone’s laughing and carrying on; they really are just like over grown teenagers.

“Does she have any friends?” Boyce adds.

I laugh at that. “I’m sure she does”

“Who is she, what’s her name?” He presses.

“A girl and she shall remain nameless”

“Is she hot?”

“I think so” I say with a smile.

I turn away and head into the showers. Thankfully no one is in here yet so I can take my time and relax under the hot spray. I can’t get her out of my mind. I want to call her but I don’t want to look like some crazy nut. I wonder what she’s doing right now. I mean I know what she's doing right now, she’s working and I kind of know what she does but, I guess I’m wondering if she would even talk to me if I called her. She did give me her number, I wonder if it’s real? I close my eyes and let the hot water pound off my face and chest. It’s like her image is burnt into my mind when I close my eyes. The soft slope of her hip, the fullness of her breast and the look on her face when she came. I start to feel warm and tingly but not from the water. A couple of the guys start to filter in and pull me from my day dream. Before I start to think to intently about her and make a fool of myself, I turn off the tap and towel off.

When I return to the dressing room I’m made aware that a couple of boys are going lunch before our road trip. I’m starving at this point and grabbing a bite with the guys sounds great. Once dressed, we go to Real Sports since it’s so convenient and we’re running short on time. Just a short walk through the bridge and we’re there. We sit in the VIP Suite and Clarke sits next to me. Everyone is exceptionally talkative after practice today, we’re all pumped to get to Montreal and beat them on their home turf. Once our food comes we all simmer down enough to devour our meals.

“So…” Clarke starts in between bites. “Not now” I give him a pleading look to hopefully shut him up. I don’t know how to explain it but I don’t want to talk about her with these guys. I don’t feel the need to brag about what we did like I normally would have in the past. We finish our meals and I have to head home to pack for the one day roadie and clean up my mess of an apartment. For a guy who doesn’t have much here, I certainly can make a mess.


I’m back at the ACC at 2pm. There’s a lot of waiting around for everything to get packed and us to head to the airport for the short 70 minute flight. We arrive at the hotel in Montreal shortly after 6. Clarke and I are roommates for the night and stand at the check in counter to get our key. We are told to drop our stuff off in our rooms and report back down at 7:30 for the team dinner. Roadies are tough sometimes, boring and always tiring but when we do these things together it makes them more bearable. I can’t imagine what it’s like for the married guys with kids or the ones with long term girlfriends. I imagine it would have to be hard. We have dinner at ‘Cavalli’ in downtown Montreal near our hotel and Centre Bell. Dinner is long and everyone starts to feel tired by the time we arrive back at the hotel at 10pm.

I changed out of my suit and flopped on my bed. “I’m so tired tonight” I say out loud as I stretch.

“I wonder why, porn star” Clarke shoots back at me.

I lay on my back with hands under my head “I want to talk to her” I state while I stare at the ceiling.

“Wait what????” Clarke looks at me like I’ve grown 3 heads.

I don’t have to see him to know the look I’m getting right now. “Don’t look at me like that” I turn my head to face him and see that I was right.

“So what’s the deal” A huge grin spreads across his face.

“With” I play coy.

“Fuck Loops! With Michele…..like is it a one timer, or what?”

“I don’t know. I mean, I told her I’d call her, and I have every intention to.” I pause. “She slept over.” Those three words change everything. No one ‘sleeps over’. No one ever stays the night. It’s The Rule. Once they spent the night it’s a game changer, you feel more, or they feel more.

“I asked her to stay” I confess.

“Holy Shit.” The look of shock on his face is almost offensive.

I look at him seriously “I really like her. She’s different than the rest, we talked…… afterward I mean, about everything and nothing at all”

“I can’t believe what I’m hearing.” He shakes his head as if questioning his consciousness.

“Believe it”

“I think with Michele, you got to know her more before, then you had with any of the others. The rest, they just fell on their backs within minutes of meeting you. At the pub, you took the time to ask her questions, and answer hers. You seem to have a lot in common too. It helps that she wasn’t an idiot either. While you were talking, Jenn and I were discussing the two of you. From what she told me Michele’s a good girl, and as for that last night, you’re lucky it even happened bud. After the two of you left last night, Jenn told me she’s not like that, from what she said you were her first 'meet and fuck'. She was shocked to see her leave with you”

“Should I call her?” Hearing that makes me want her more.

“NO not yet! What’s wrong with you?" He looks at me incredulously, like I’ve asked him if I should marry her.

“Since the moment she left this morning, I’ve wanted to call, but I don’t want to look like a stalker.”

“DO NOT CALL HER or that’s exactly how you’ll look.”

“I’m going to text her, tell her good night” I plead with him.

“Whatever dude, just DON”T CALL”

Good night, Beautiful. From freezing Montreal!’

I tell him what I type. “At least it wasn’t something stupid”

“Thanks” I answer sarcastically.

I turn off the light, lie in bed and think. She is amazing. I keep thinking about last night at the bar and of course in my bed. I don't regret a thing that happened. I can’t believe I forgot to put a condom on in the middle of the night when I pinned her to the bed. But it felt so natural to be inside her like that. A perfect fit, so amazing and unbelievably hot. I rolled on my side facing away from Clarke and fall into a deep sleep.


I wake up at 6 am. I shouldn’t be up yet, it’s still early. I can’t help it, I want to be the last thing she thinks about before she goes to sleep and the first thing when she wakes up, I send her another message. Before I fall back asleep.

‘Good morning beautiful! Watch my game tonight? We’re playing Montreal, it’s always an exciting game.’


Wednesday, March 16, 2011

2. 1, 2, 3, 4

"1234" Feist

One, two, three, four
Tell me that you love me more
Sleepless long nights
That is what my youth was for

Old teenage hopes are alive at your door
Left you with nothing but they want some more

Oh, you're changing your heart
Oh, You know who you are

Luckily I arrived in the parking garage at work earlier than anticipated. I hustle over to the elevator and press the button up to the 32nd floor.

In my office I gather my presentation material, which thankfully I already had prepared before I left last night. I get to the boardroom ahead on everyone else so at least I have some time to prepare. This meeting will be broadcast to our selected affiliates worldwide so the heat is on to everything ready in time. I’d better not screw this up.

I set up the computer, T.V’s and telephones, I do a test run and we’re good to go. I welcome people as they arrive, at 9am on the dot we’re live, thankfully without any problems. The meeting is dreadfully long and drawn out, not as in the material, that, if I do say so myself was stellar; well organized and through, just the way I like it. But I’m so sleep deprived and the three hours worth of discussion that followed, now that was what went horribly. It was just too long and too much effort required on a day like today, and I was dying of hunger by the time it was over.

It was agreed before we left the boardroom that we we’re going to head out to lunch as a group. I could handle that. It was a welcome change to be around my colleagues, they were a lively bunch to say the least and always reliable for a good laugh. We decided to go to a Sassfraz, a great restaurant in Yorkville. Once there, we ordered our drinks and meals. I was in the mood for some comfort food so I ordered the mushroom and truffle ravioli in a light herb cream sauce with scallions, pasta is my go to, always good to warm the body and ease the mind.

“You seem a little of today” Tracey, my boss says to me shortly after our food arrives.

“What do you mean?” I play aloof, looking at her with a surprised look on my face.

“I don’t know, you’re very quiet today. Plus you look like shit.” She states. This makes me choke. I shouldn’t be surprised, she’s a pistol like that, but I’m really not on the ball today.

”Thanks” I shoot back at her. “Not as in shit like noticeable to anyone else, but I know you and you look tired. Are you feeling okay? Maybe it’s the Flu!” she exclaims wildly.

Like I’m going to tell her that every muscle in my body is sore. And that it's directly due to the fact that I had one of the best nights of my life last night, having sex with one of the most beautiful men I’ve ever laid my eyes on.

“Maybe it is the flu, but I don’t think so, I had a tough time falling a sleeping last night. I think I just need to go home, have a hot bath and a good night’s sleep. I’ll be fine by tomorrow, I promise”

She seems satisfied with that and I turn my attention to the ongoing ‘Where are you going for your summer vacation?’ conversation. Everyone here is married with children and have all these great plans of where they’ll go and what they’ll do this year.

When my turn comes around I simply say “I think I’m going on a 4 day trip to Montreal with my roommate, and out west to visit some friends in Alberta, maybe a trip down south, that will be at the end of the year, but other than that nothing big” That changes the topic to how great it must be to be single and able to fly by the seat of my pants. I just smile and nod, then motion to our server that we're ready for the bill.

Shortly after we pay our respective tabs, we hop on the TTC heading south bound toward our office on Bay Street, it’s the Canadian equivalent to Wall Street.

I read my missed emails and am made aware that I have 3 reports that must be sent out before I leave for the night. Great, looks like I’m staying late tonight. At 6:45pm I call Jenn to tell her I’m on my way, she doesn’t answer her phone so I leave a message. I power down my computer, grab my purse and head out.

I hop in my car and as soon as I pull out of the garage I crank my tunes. I love driving; it beats the hell out of public transit any day, for comfort and convenience. Plus, I love how the city looks at night. The Toronto skyline is one of the prettiest I’ve seen. The drive home is smooth sailing; only 15mins….that’s unheard of in this city. I’m feeling better than I have all day, which is a welcome change.

I arrive home shortly after 7, only to find the place empty but a note on the table.

‘Got called into work! I’ll have to rain check for another night. Don’t wait up! Luv, Jenn XOXO.’

In a way I’m relieved. I just want to relax and get some rest, not relive last night vocally, it’s bad enough that I’ve caught myself day dreaming about it frequently throughout the day.

I change out of my suit into just an over sized T-shirt and pull my hair into a high messy bun on the top of my head. I‘m not really hungry so I just warm up some left over’s and hit the couch. There is nothing on T.V on Wednesday night, except hockey and for once I’m not in the mood to watch, I don’t need any more distractions. Anymore reasons to think of him.

It’s not like the Leafs are even playing tonight, but that doesn’t stop the constant mention of them. It’s bad enough that at work I had to hear the play by play of the Leafs win last night and chide remarks that he did nothing that game. I was kinda offended. I guess I couldn’t help it, I’m kinda fond of him and I was attached to him like 8 hours prior.

In Toronto, everyone’s a commentator here, everyone watches and everyone has an opinion including myself. I can’t help it, I’m not a big Leafs fan, but deep down I really want them to win. They’re my home town team after all.Who doesn't want to see their home team win the cup?

So after about an hour of channel surfing I decide to run my bath. I need to listen to some music to help me wind down and choose my ‘Lite’ playlist, and the soft sounds of Feist fill the air. I hum to myself as I head into the bath room and clean out the tub before adding lots of hot water, some lavender sea salts and a cap full of unscented bubble bath. I turn on the jets and watch the water foam. I love that we have a Jacuzzi tub and whip off my T-shirt in anticipation, moments later I’m submerged in the warmth and comfort of the water.

I’ve always found water very soothing, whether I’m in it or around it, it calms me. The forceful stream of water from the jets push at my muscles and it feels so good. My neck and thighs were so sore but I feel the tension slowly draining from them. I could stay here all night. I close my eyes focus on my breathing and relax. What seems like minutes later, my playlist ends signaling I’ve been laying here for nearly an hour already, I grab a towel and dry off quickly and wrap myself up in my warm snuggly robe.

I put on my nightie and hop into bed with my lap top. I check my emails, and read some blogs I religiously follow. It’s nearly 12 am when I'm finished reading and I decide it’s time to hit the hay. I wrap the duvet around me and reach over to turn off the light, my phone is blinking and its lighting up my room like a strobe light. I grab my cell, flick my screen on and that’s when I notice 1 new text. I open it.

From: Unknown name, Unknown number.

‘Good night, Beautiful. From freezing Montreal!’

I smile to myself and bite my lip, then snuggle deeper into the sheets. I don’t think I’d ever hear from him again…….. It’s going to be a good night’s sleep after all!


I slept soundly through the night, my mind filled with dreams of his touch, his kiss and his eyes. It’s unlike me to get all bent out of shape over a guy, especially one I just met and quite frankly didn’t know a thing about. I’ve been single for a while now….6 months to be specific, but it ended long before that, but as we all know nothing takes longer to heal then a broken heart.

I had been with Dave for nearly seven years when I found out that he cheated on me “Only one time, it only happened once, Babe. It didn’t mean anything” well maybe not to him, but it meant everything to me. I tried to look past it and forgive his indiscretion but it haunted me. For those last 5 months it was all I could think about, and picturing him in bed touching her, the faceless woman who ruined my life, I couldn’t handle it.

I couldn’t even bring myself to have sex with him, the thought just made me sick. I didn’t want his hands on me, they were dirty now. He tried so hard to get back in, dinners at fancy restaurants, flowers even jewelry, I knew he was just trying to but my affections, but I wasn’t having any of it. My love can’t be bought. It may have happened only once, but that was one time too many.

So, last year mid-September, I had a box of his things ready and waiting for him when he came over to visit one night. I took back my key and told him I never wanted to see him again. He was shocked but didn’t put up much of a fight. He called me a bitch and a whore, and said that "I’ll never find anyone to love me like he loves me" You know, all the wildly imaginative things guys’ think to say when they get hurt. But he left immediately after his little boy rant.

The next day I decided I needed to change my life, I’m not a kid anymore, I’m 28 years old, time to grow up already and I really felt like he was really holding me back. So I went full speed ahead. I quit my job, which I hated and enrolled in night school to get my broker license.

I also decided that it was time to liven up my home as well. So I picked out new paint colours, nothing crazy I like to keep it mellow and calming. My bedroom was the first upheaval; it was gray and dull, so I changed it to a light violet with bright white trim, with white curtains. The rest of the house got a pale shade of yellow to really brighten it up and I loved the trim from the bedroom so much that I carried it throughout the entire place. Lastly, I had painted one large accent wall a medium brown; let’s call it coffee, one cream. I kept all my furniture. I shampooed, then recovered the couch, love seat and chair, then accented them with throw pillows. I also finally bought the 6 foot tall picture/painting of the Effiel Tower I’ve been eyeballing for a while.

If you couldn’t guess, I love to decorate. I just never did it with Dave, he hated change but I love it, in my home anyways. I think you should change things up every year or two just to keep it fresh. This whole transformation took about 2 weeks since I was going to school and studying like mad. I don’t care what anyone says it’s hard to go back to school as an adult especially when you jump into something that’s completely new to you.

I decided that I deserved a treat for all my hard work so I headed over to The Brick to buy myself a King size bed. I’ve wanted to upgrade for quite some time but Dave didn’t think it was a good idea.

After I made my selection I went all out and bought 4 sets of luxury sheets, 1000 thread count Egyptian cotton. They were on sale at Home Outfitters for 75% off, it was such a steal! They felt like heaven. I couldn’t wait to wash them and choose a set to sleep on.

After the bed was made I looked around the room and felt an overwhelming surge of pride and happiness. The tears fell down my face at their own will. It was a cleansing cry to rid myself of all the remorse and pain I felt. It wasn’t completely gone but I knew I was headed in the right direction.

The alarm on my phone went off at 6:15AM. I grabbed my phone to dismiss the alarm when I notice another new text.

From: Unknown name, Unknown number.

‘Good morning beautiful! Watch my game tonight? We’re playing Montreal, it’s always an exciting game.’

What time does this guy wake up???

A huge smile spills across my face and I can’t contain the giddy feeling I have. I can’t remember the last time I felt like this. At least I’ll get to see him tonight, even if it's only on T.V.