14. I’M NOT IN LOVE

I saw your picture hangin' on the back of my door

Won’t give you my heart no one lives there anymore

And we were lovers now we can't be friends

Fascination ends

Here we go again

Oooh

Cause it's cold outside, when you coming home

Cause it's hot inside, isn't that enough

I'm not in love

I'm not in love

I'm not in love

Could it be that time has taken it's toll

Won't take you so far, I am in control

And we were lovers and we can't be friends

Fascination ends

Here we go again

Ooooh

Cause it's cold outside, when you coming home

Cause it's hot inside, isn't that enough

I'm not in love

I'm not in love

I'm not in love

We are not in love

The restaurant is quant. We get a room off to the side and I dutifully sit beside Joff even though I want to throttle him right now. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy I don’t have to sleep in the same room with him while he’s drunk and trying to fuck me. Frankly, it’s a relief. But did he really have to make a production in front of everyone about not wanting to be uncomfortable…….Really?.... He must really think I’m slow. I knew something was up, but after hearing what he said in the hallway, that just validated my intuition.

At first I was hurt. I went into the shower and cried my eyes out. It takes a lot to make me cry, I’m no whiner. But in that moment I was humiliated. Who did he say that to? Darryl?... Phil?... Tyler? I wanted to die inside I was so embarrassed.

I decided to pull myself together and after a quick arrangement to get a ride home on Monday morning and a reservation at the chalet here, I got ready to face the source of my humiliation face to face. I decided that I would confront Joff in the morning, and alone.

Thankfully, Tyler sits beside Phil directly across from me and Jenn beside me with Luca across from her, at least I’ll be able to talk to them. Dinner goes well and Jenn and Luca seemed to hit it off well.

Once the plates have been cleared the conversation quickly turns to going out to a club or bar and I instantly know I will not be joining them.

“We’ll have a few drinks at the lodge before we head out. Get my girl a little tipsy.” Joffrey says to me as he acknowledges for the first time that I’m right beside him, sliding his arm around my shoulders.

“Actually, since I’m feeling a little under the weather. I think I’ll just stay in tonight, I’m not really feeling too hot.” With that I shrug his arm off of me and take a deep breath for effect.

“I’m feeling a little rough myself” Tyler pipes up and catches my eye when I look right at him.

“Great, don’t you two sickos go and get the rest of us sick” Joffrey jokes and the table laughs. He really isn’t a bad guy to be friends with. If I wasn’t dating him, I’d really like hanging out with him.

We pay our bill, well they pay the bill and head back to the chalet so the others can get ready to go out. I’ll get a full report on the night’s events from Jenn when she gets in, if she’s not too tipsy or otherwise occupied.

As soon as we walk in the house Tyler puts another log on the fire and I play bartender for a couple of rounds before the rest head out.

I line up a row of shot glasses and pour 2 rounds of tequila for these party animals.

“Let’s get outta here” Luca pipes up as he slams down his shot glass and starts to usher everyone out the door. Joff comes up and wraps his arm around me and kisses my forehead good bye.

“Watch my girl tonight Bozie, make sure nothing happens to her.”

“No worries Loops, she’s safe with me.” He answers and I believe him.

Jenn comes up and gives me the typical tipsy-girl hug. “Don’t wait up Mom.” She says with her sly smile then whispers “Be a good girl, he’s fragile. He really likes you, you know” motioning her head toward Tyler. “Have fun tonight Jenny.” With that I shut the door and we’re alone.

I’m suddenly very aware that Tyler is here with me and I feel giddy and nervous. I don’t know why I’m feeling like this.

“Are you feeling ok?” He asks as I hear him approaching me. I turn to face him.

“I’m good, I just really didn’t want to go out. I was actually going to go in the hot tub for a soak. Loosen up the muscles you know? Care to join me?”

I can’t believe I just asked him that.

Apparently neither did Tyler as a deep blush sweeps up his thick neck. How is it that I hadn’t noticed that before now?

“Sure” Is all he has time to say before I took off to my room to change.

As soon as I heard her door shut I took the stairs two at a time to get changed and get the hot tub ready. I throw on my trunks, grab my towel and race outside onto the snow covered deck. I hear her put on some music. Something I don’t recognize, it’s almost like a soft techno if that’s possible. It’s not annoying at all, very light and slow. I almost forgot something to drink and run to grab us two waters from the fridge.

When I come back to the tub she’s already immersed in the hot bubbles. She looks beautiful with her hair pulled up in a loose ponytail. A few pieces of hair that escaped their confinement are now wet and sticking to her neck and collarbone.

My eyes travel lower across her chest and I watch the soft rounds of her breasts bob on the top of the water. I knew they were real. She is already covered with a light sheen of condensation across her skin.

I feel my dick twitch as I take in the sight before me. I have to get in the water before I embarrass myself. I’m freezing but I’m too cold to care currently.

“How’s the water?” I ask casually as I hand her the bottle of water.

“Perfect” She smiles taking the bottle from my hand. I walk back over to my side of the tub adjusting myself along the way. I look at Michelle and catch her looking over my body and a rush of heat comes over me. There’s a look on her face of….. I don’t know surprise? For a second I think I see a flash of desire in her eyes and before I can confirm it, it’s gone and I’m not entirely sure I had seen it at all. The heat inside me was boiling over, but the freezing cold temperatures around me snap me back to the reality that I’m physically frozen. I step into the water slowly, sit down and start to defrost.

We talk about the normal stuff people do when they are trying to feel each other out. I feel like I’m on a first date although we are wearing a lot less clothing then I’m used to for a date.

Our feet touch under the water and I pull them away immediately. We’re too close…I’m too close. I have be insane staying here tonight alone like this. I must love to torture myself because that’s the only name you can give to what I am currently doing. I want to untie the top of her orange-y pink bikini and replace the triangles with my hands. I want to kiss her soft full lips and… “How long has Joffrey been sleeping with other people?”

Silence. If it was summer you’d hear the crickets chirping with how quite it has gotten. The glorious image in my head had burst as soon as those words leave her lips. The only sound I can currently hear is my own breathing as it echoes in my ears. I look at her and that look is back, the one from earlier today.

“Do you love him?” Again my stupid brain isn’t fast enough to stop my lips but I keep looking at her to see her reaction.

Her face stays straight as she shakes her head slowly back and forth. “No, I just met him. I did like him at first. Things change. It sucks to get played, you know?”

I nod my head in agreement because I know what it’s like to be used. “Unfortunately, some people play on and off the ice….just try to remember that not all of us are like that okay?

“Kinda hard to do when you’re the one getting hurt.”

I cautiously get closer to her, reach for her arm and pull her towards me until she’s in my arms. She slides into my chest, and puts her face in the hollow of my neck when she leans her head onto my shoulder. It’s an intimate gesture and I feel myself start to stir to life at the act.

“I’m sorry he’s hurt you.” I honestly say to her.

“I’m ending things with him in the morning.”

We stay like that for a few minutes until she startles me. “It’s getting a little too hot. I’m going to get out now. Are you staying in?” She asks as she rises out from the water in front of me.

Holy Shit! My eyes are everywhere. Her body is unstoppable. So curvy, if it was road I’d want to drive it forever. “…Umm yeah, I’m really hot right now” I tell her because it’s the truth and I want to spend as much time alone with Michelle as I can before everyone gets back.

She hides herself by wrapping up in a towel. I don’t want her to freeze but can’t she just stand there a little while longer?

“Did you want to watch a movie?” I ask her, trying to drag this out as long as possible.

“I’m up for a movie. Can I have a quick shower first wash to the chemicals off?”

“Sure, I’m going to have one too. Meet you on the couch in 15?”

“15” she says as we race into the house to escape the freezing cold.

I’m so amped up by the time I’m in the shower that I have to rub one out so I can control myself better around her.

In record time I’m dried off and throw on my flannel PJ bottoms, t-shirt and a hoodie.

I was already in the living room collecting empty beer bottles by the time he came down.

“Here let me help” he grabs the remaining bottle and follows me into the kitchen where the empties go back in the boxes.

“So what are we going to snack on?”

“I think we brought popcorn.” Tyler says looking into one of the cupboards. He holds up his find then places the bag in the microwave. I slice up some apples and arrange them on a plate.

The timer goes off and Tyler grabs the popcorn and 2 more waters before making his way back to the couch. I see him looking through the selection of movies at the T.V. I rip off some paper towels, take the plate and join him.

“Ok, so there isn’t really much to choose from here.” He says looking back at me. “What kind of movie do you want to watch?”

“Surprise me” I tell him and laugh when he rolls his eyes at me. He’s a very calm person and I feel really at ease with him.

“Transformers it is” he says waving it over his shoulder at me. He pops it in the Blueray player and sits on the couch. It’s a sectional and we each sit on either side of the bend in the L, our heads almost touching.

The movie starts and we start pointing out our likes. Half way through the movie we’ve stopped talking about the Autobots and he’s asking me questions about my life my parents and we’re telling each other stories and laughing.

He talks about leaving home at 16 to play and what it was like being away from home so much. He told me about playing for Denver and his friends and former teammates from school.

We change the T.V. back to cable to watch the hockey highlights from the night. Something I never did with Joff. It was definitely interesting hearing what someone who actually plays in the league had to say about the day’s events.

I grabbed our empty snack plates, washed them and put them away.

“You want to watch another movie?” Tyler called to me. “I think I saw Top Gun there, it’s one of my favourites!”

When I got back to the couch I lay down and snuggled into the over sized throw pillow. “I’ve probably seen this move a thousand times”

“Me too” he replies.

We get to my favorite part in the movie, where they sing in the bar. My head shot off the pillow when Tyler started singing along with Maverick, Goose and company. My cheeks hurt from smiling so much as I watch him belt out the tune.

“Sorry, couldn’t help it it’s my favorite part” he adds, his cheeks turning pink.

“Mine too… who would have thought hockey player and singing phenomenon” I say as I lay my back down just as I get gently whacked in the head with Tyler’s pillow.

I woke when I felt myself being lifted up off the couch. I knew it was Tyler and snuggled my face against his chest and shoulder. His body was so hard but I molded to him perfectly. He smells so good.

He carried me slowly up the stairs to my room and laid me down on the bed. He pulled away for a minute and I heard some rustling, I knew it was his sweater when he covered me with it because of its warmth and the fresh smell that was uniquely Tyler.

He pulled the blanket up over me and tucked me in, making sure my face was the only part still exposed. “Good night beautiful girl” he whispered after brushing my hair out of my face. The last thing I heard was the door clicking shut.

*************************************************************************************

I awoke to the gloriously fragrant smell of coffee wafting through the air. I slept like a champ last night and stretched my body like a cat after a nap.

I lay in bed for a while looking out the window and thinking about what I had to do this morning. I knew that what Joff and I had was fun but it ran its course and was over now.

After going over everything I wanted to say to him in my head I decided that there was no time like the present.

I was just sitting up when there was a knock at my bedroom door.